Blue Steel

I’m looking through wedding and honeymoon pictures, and I’m remembering (once again) that I have three faces I make if a camera is pointed at me:
1) biting tongue while smiling
2) head pulled back double-chin extravaganza
3) smile so large I look like Arsenio Hall after drinking 10 Red Bulls

Today I’m sharing with you some photos from our honeymoon: the result of Sky trying to teach me how to pose for the camera. Sky should know because he’s been a male model.* He told me to look “dead inside” and then demonstrated for me.

I tried it.

Sky commentary: You look pissed.

Sky commentary: This looks very 'Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret'

And then he said “More artistic, less autistic.” Which. Well.

And we’re done.

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* He was “dude who works so hard he falls asleep at his desk” in a SOMA spread in the late 1990s. He had Vaseline all over his face so he was a very sensual looking sleepy dude who works so hard he falls asleep at his desk. Needless to say, this comes up a lot.